Ted the Penguin

Adventures in Cooking…

Ok, so most people know that I consider myself a decent cook. Well I was duped tonight… by myself, and it ended quite interestingly.

I was making breakfast for dinner tonight, eggs, grits, bacon, toast, etc. Simple enough, right? Well my mother is on a diet, and she wanted just egg whites. Her words, “In the bottom of the fridge, use the egg whites in the half and half like container.” Well this is what I heard, “In the bottom of the fridge, use the egg whites in the half and half container.”

Now you may be thinking, why would egg whites be in a half and half container? Seth, what could have possibly have been going through your mind? Well to be honest, it did cross my mind, it just didn’t stay very long. It’s not inconcievieble in this house for odd things to be in odd places… or containers. Lets continue with the story though…

So I did what any self respecting son would do, I listened to my mother and poured the contents of the half and half container into the hot pan with a little bit of olive oil. It started to bubble, I added a little bit of salt and pepper like I usually do when cooking eggs and waited. Well nothing happened. As could be expected when heating up half and half with olive oil, salt and pepper. Needless to say, I was very confused and proceeded to taste the mixture. (No lecture on how bad it would have been to taste raw egg whites please, this only occurred to me about 40 minutes later. And look, I’m still standing.)

Well it wasn’t egg whites, as you’ve probably guessed. I was trying to cook half and half with olive oil, salt, pepper, and a bit o’ heat. Needless to say, it didn’t work. At this point my mom came in, proceeded to laugh at me, and got the actual container of egg whites. I wiped out the pan, cooked the egg whites and dinner was decent.

Nothing like a little night adventure in the kitchen though… :-\

*Insert bad joke about worrying over spilled milk here*